My Journey to Rheumatoid Arthritis: When a Healthy Lifestyle Isn’t Enough
- Amy
- Feb 12
- 7 min read
Updated: 8 hours ago
This is a tough one, but here goes.
Let me preface this by saying that I have always been a pretty disciplined, health-conscious person. I eat clean and mostly whole foods. I intentionally watch sugar and carb intake. I read labels. I don’t do seed oils or processed foods. I take my vitamins and supplements religiously (and there are quite a few). I pay attention to macros. I stay active.
Hence why my husband and kids refer to me as “hippy.”
For me, it’s not a phase — it’s a lifestyle-level commitment. And those who know me, know how committed and picky I can be. 😉
I personally don’t love going to the gym, so I built one in my home office. I follow various programs online. When I go for a brisk 3+ mile walk, I wear a 15-pound weighted vest (and have for years).
I say all of that to illustrate how this diagnosis hit me like a ton of bricks.
And to say: this is my journey.
The Stress Before the Storm
Looking back, I felt things changing physically a few years ago. And while I honestly can’t pinpoint the exact moment, I became more aware in early 2023 following a few years of major life changes.
During the craziness in 2020, we lost my mom unexpectedly that July. Then in May 2021 — the week before our oldest daughter graduated from high school — our house was struck by lightning, and we had a major house fire. We were displaced for over five months while repairs were being done. And in the middle of the house repairs and all of that chaos, our oldest moved away to start her new life.
That 15-month stretch was beyond stressful.
Perimenopause… Then Menopause
By early 2023, I knew I was in perimenopause and struggling. I felt “off.” Irritable. Overly emotional. Puffy. Gaining weight for no reason, in places I never had it before. Hot flashes. Sleepless nights. Any of you in that phase of life know the drill. It sucked. Big time.
I joined MidiHealth and started HRT, which helped tremendously. Slowly but surely, I started to feel like myself again.
Then in July 2025, my husband and I took a long trip to Spain with friends and had a great time — and during that trip I officially hit menopause. With glee and excitement, I might add. Yippee!
But by early August, everything changed.
The Shoulders...Oh the Shoulders
My shoulders, which had been aching for a several months off and on, became incredibly stiff and painfully immobile. I could barely lift my arms over my head. Getting dressed was a struggle. Doing daily tasks was a struggle. Getting out of bed was a struggle. Lifting weights was impossible.
The pain was constant and demoralizing.
Then it started affecting my sleep. As a side sleeper, I couldn’t find a position that didn’t hurt. I was using four pillows — including one I practically slept on top of — just to try to take pressure off my shoulders.
And for someone who avoids medication unless absolutely necessary, the fact that even ibuprofen didn’t help was unsettling.
That’s when I knew this wasn’t normal soreness. This wasn’t “I overdid it.” This was something else.
After doing a ton of research, I saw an orthopedic specialist in early September, worried I had torn a rotator cuff or strained something. X-rays and tests showed no tears — just frozen shoulder. Common in post-menopausal women, he said. It made sense.
Do PT. Be patient. It could take up to 18 months.
I did everything I was told to do, all of the daily exercises and stretches. Went for follow-ups. But nothing helped. And it just got progressively worse.
The Gut Feeling
I knew in my gut something wasn’t right.
Yes, my shoulders hurt — but now the ache was spreading. Other joints were stiff. My body felt inflamed. I just felt uncomfortable in my own skin, which just made me angry and (probably) more irritable, not to mention frustrated.
In late September 2025, I joined Ways2Well (Improving Health & Wellness | Treatments & Supplements), which I had wanted to do for a long time, and had extensive wellness bloodwork done. My biological age? 40 (all that “hippy crap” paying off!). All tests were good except testosterone was low, cholesterol was high (which shocked me), and inflammation was very high. Major red flag.
The Breaking Point
The breaking point for me was when we were in Green Bay, WI, the first weekend in December for the Packers-Bears game at Lambeau Field (Go Pack Go!).
When I woke up that Saturday morning (the game was on Sunday), I could barely get out of bed. My joints — even my fingers — were so stiff and painful I felt trapped in my own body. Everything hurt from my shoulders down. I was practically shaking. It would loosen up slightly as the day went on, but the ache never left. I just grinned and beared it (no pun intended).
At my annual OBGYN visit the next week, she noticed how swollen I was. I filled her in on everything over the last few months and after hearing the full story, she recommended autoimmune testing. She mentioned lupus.
My heart sank.
I did labs in her office, and my ESR came back at 50. Normal is under 20. She told me to see a rheumatologist. Immediately.
The Diagnosis
The week before Christmas, I met with the rheumatologist. Ten vials of blood. A full autoimmune panel. I logged into Quest daily to see results trickle in. I ran everything through ChatGPT and Grok, trying to make sense of it. I tested negative for lupus. Negative for Sjogren’s. Even negative for the rheumatoid factor.
But my ESR was now 53.
On my follow-up visit on January 22, 2026, she walked in and didn’t sugarcoat it. Seronegative rheumatoid arthritis. Even though I tested negative for the standard RA marker, my symptoms and inflammatory markers told the story. She explained everything calmly and thoroughly, went down line-by-line of my test results and how she came to my diagnosis. Then she outlined the treatment plan.
No cure.
With tears in my eyes, I asked her— was it something I did? Something I ate? Something I missed? Was there something I could have done differently? The immediate thought running through my head was that I should have started my wellness routine earlier...
She shook her head and put her hand on my knee in comfort. “It’s not your fault. Your immune system just decided to attack your joints.”
She explained how it could be hereditary (turns out it isn’t, I asked my Dad), environmental factors, stress. She asked if I was under stress or recently had a very stressful or traumatic event (I later learned a high level of cortisol for an extended period can cause an RA flare). Who knows, she said, we’ll never know what caused it.
That might have been the moment that broke me the most. Not because I caused it — but because I couldn’t control it. And if you know me, you know I’m kind of a control freak anyway, and control over my health has always been my thing.
The Emotional Whiplash
After finally getting through menopause…
After looking forward to traveling more with my husband as we officially become empty nesters this year as our youngest graduates from high school in May…
This.
A lifelong autoimmune disease marked by chronic inflammation and pain.
I was relieved to finally have a diagnosis and a path forward. Vindicated that I wasn’t imagining things. But man — it sucks. Like, really sucks!
Mornings are the hardest. Sometimes it takes up to an hour to straighten my knees, move my hands, walk upright. Some days are better than others. Some days feel heavy.
This is my new normal. And coming to terms with that has honestly been harder than the diagnosis itself.
Where I Am Now
I’ve accepted (albeit slowly and am still working on) that this is part of my story. And it's only been a month, so will take time.
I’ve spent hours researching to understand every aspect of the disease, including going down various rabbit holes. I’ve adjusted my supplements, cut back or cut out any inflammatory foods. I’m on medication and low-dose prednisone (hoping to taper off), both of which have really helped. I get labs drawn monthly to monitor liver health due to the meds.
I’m learning to manage stress. I’m learning to recognize flares. I’m learning to slow down. And I’m moving again, listening to my body and not pushing it too hard or too fast to cause damage.
I started taking long walks with my weighted vest — slower, but steady. My knees ache, but I’m doing it. I’m easing back into strength training, even if it’s just 5-pound dumbbells. And I bought a vibrating plate and spend at least 20 minutes a day on it, generally more, as it helps with lymphatic drainage and swelling.
Movement is still medicine, and it feels so good!
I’ve also accepted that I don’t move because I’m chasing aesthetics anymore and realize that I probably won’t ever be the size I was even last year. I move because I’m fighting for function and to prevent further regression and potential debilitation of my muscle fibers (which so far are good and strong), joints and bones.
And This Isn’t a Pity Party
I know others have it worse. And I know RA isn’t the end of the world.
But I also know it’s okay to grieve the version of yourself you thought you’d be – or wanted to be and working towards.
It’s okay to be angry. It’s okay to be frustrated. It’s okay to say this sucks.
And it’s also okay to keep going.
This is my journey. And I’m not done yet.
If you’re walking through something similar — autoimmune issues, menopause, unexplained inflammation — trust your gut. Advocate for yourself. Keep asking questions.
And don’t let anyone tell you it’s “just aging” if you know in your bones it’s more than that.
Our bodies are always communicating. Sometimes we just have to learn a new language to understand them.
Hippy Crap Anti-Inflammatory Grocery List
Eating in a way that supports your body doesn’t have to be complicated. This Hippy Crap Anti-Inflammatory Grocery List is a simple guide to the everyday foods I keep stocked in my kitchen that make it easier for me to cook balanced, nourishing meals that support overall wellness.
Whether you’re trying to eat healthier, support joint health, or just simplify your weekly grocery shopping, this list helps take the guesswork out of what to buy.
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